Up early? No, up late.

So...as I start to write this it is 6:27am and I haven't slept a wink all night.  I finally gave up on even having a nap and got up, showered and just finished eating breakfast.  A solid night's sleep is a treat these days...I haven't been sleeping well for months and anyone who knows me knows how much I love my sleep!  Of course while I lay there staring into the darkness so many wise and witty things run through my mind as possible journal entries, but when I actually sit down to do it, I don't remember any of it.

Been having a hard time emotionally again over the last while...I suspect the next couple of months will be difficult as I near and pass my due date.  Some days when I'm feeling down it's definitely baby related, but some days it's not...obviously the miscarriage is what triggered the downward spiral, but now that I'm down here, a bad day isn't necessarily sparked by anything baby related.  Some days it doesn't seem related to anything, I just feel sad.  It's amazing how when you're feeling depressed you notice all of the things you ignore when you're feeling good...my bad knees are suddenly extra painful, my back and shoulders are sore, my TMJs hurt...I think I need to start a gratitude journal again, something a counsellor taught me some time ago.  At the end of the day write down 3 good things that happened, anything from sharing a joke with the cashier at the grocery store to accomplishing a task...without the conscious effort to think about positive things it's easy to forget them.

Comments

[Jared]

I like the gratitude journal entry idea, ending on a positive note can never be a bad thing.